When I was younger, I used to let just about everybody into my life. Not because I thought I was better than anyone, but because I honestly didn’t have any discernment.

Thank God for my wife. She would tell me, “Stay away from him. He’s bad news.”

And that happened more times than I care to admit. 😂

I think when the Lord found me in 2003, those lines became even more blurred because I started to over-spiritualize everything. I was giving people a level of proximity they hadn’t earned yet.

But the more I learned, the more I realized that Jesus gave us an example of proximity. And that kind of blew my mind.

We all know Judas. He betrayed Jesus. And I think most of us have had people in our lives who have crossed us in some way.

But here’s something worth thinking about: Judas was there the whole time. He was there while Jesus was building, teaching, and carrying out His purpose.

And isn’t that how it happens sometimes in our own lives?

You have people who have been around you the entire time. They’re there while you’re building your business, raising your family, working toward your goals, and trying to make something out of your life. They’ve had a front-row seat to your journey. They’ve been close enough to see things that other people never get to see.

And sometimes, those are the very people who end up crossing you.

Then you had the other disciples. They were close, but they weren’t as close as Peter, James, and John.

That’s the parallel I wanted to make clear.

Jesus had different levels of proximity with the people around Him.

Think about the Transfiguration. Peter, James, and John were the ones Jesus took with Him up the mountain. And when Jesus went to the home of Jairus to raise his daughter, He allowed only Peter, James, and John, along with the girl’s parents, to enter the room with Him. Everyone else was put outside.

Now, obviously, Jesus had a level of discernment that we could never fully have, but I believe there’s something pretty amazing we can learn from His example.

The older I get, the more I’m learning this:

EVERYONE DOESN’T DESERVE THE SAME PROXIMITY.

And I’m not one of those people who believes you should just cut everybody off. I’m also not one of those people who believes people never change.

I don’t believe that at all.

I believe the Spirit of God can change people. But I also believe people need time to mature.

And just because we’re praying for someone, wishing them the best, and believing God for their life doesn’t mean they automatically get the same access to us.

You can love people without giving them unlimited access to your life.

You can forgive people without putting them back in the same position.

You can wish someone well and still understand that they haven’t earned the same level of proximity.

Love people. Pray for people. Wish people well. But use discernment when it comes to who you allow close.